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THINGS JAPANESE: PACHINKO!

If you were ever wondering, how can I lose all my money, self-respect, dignity, and hearing at the same time, well, someone in Nagoya invented the answer sometime in the last century. Since this accidental discovery, which has now spread like a plague across the surface of the entire country, many millions of salarymen, housewives, schoolkids, people from virtually any segment of society, have gathered individually in Pachinko Parlours throughout the nation in a ritual of self-impoverishment and ear-damage - often on a daily basis.

Some people have been known to claim that Pachinko Parlours may possibly run by groups connected in some loose and undefined way to the Yakuza, the Japanese equivalent of the Mafia. I do not know if this is true, and I will not risk my little finger to find out. (If you do not understand that reference, wait for the article on the Yakuza). Where was I. Pachinko Parlours are found all over the country, and very many of them. There are a good couple of dozen in Okazaki, and they spring up in the strangest places in the middle of nowhere.

The buildings themselves are always very distinctive - lots of glass, chrome, neon lights, or sometimes look like fake Egyptian temples, castles, and so on. All very distinctive. They stand out for miles, as they seem to not be bound by Japanese planning regulations, although Japan doesn't really seem to have any. What helps them stand out is the searchlights playing like anti-aircraft batteries over the clouds.

Inside they consist of rows of machines, back to back, so that there are aisles that you can walk down and select your machine. One shop usually has at least a hundred, and the larger ones may have a thousand. In front of each, is a dazed individual with their eyes fixed on the glass in front of them. Pachinko is like a vertical pinball game, and little bearings made of metal and about 5mm across pop out of the left side of the machine. By turning a dial with the right hand, you can adjust the speed at which the bearings come out. If you hit the right pins or get the bearing to enter the right hole, then you win lots more metal balls. You collect these through the evening, keeping them in trays by your chair. You pay for this game by putting large amounts of cash into the machine and being given lots of metal balls which are worthless.

Then the really weird bit. You take all your winnings (if any) to the person in the back of the shop. They then reward you with a slip of paper with the number of bearings or some such code written on it, and your "prize" - usually a packet of cigarettes, a fluffy toy, washing powder, soap, chocolate bar, that sort of thing. DON'T EAT THE CHOCOLATE. You then take your "prize" out the back of the Pachinko Parlour, where you meet a shady character in the parking lot. He then takes your prize and slip, and "buys" the fluffy toy/soap/packet-of-10-year-old-cigarettes from you for a vast sum of money equivalent to your winnings. Because it's illegal to win money for this kind of game.

The first experience is always unforgettable.